101| It moves on…

11 12 2009

continued from 101| it starts


So, I opened her email and it read “ so you think you have game huh”

In response to my “Are you as interesting as you are” one liner, she did seem like th type that likes to be woo-ed!

Wait, who am I kidding here, which hottie does not like to be woo-ed!!

So I set about planning how to make this Ms. Fyne Ness the future Mrs. Fyne Ness Basiks!

I replied her email and told her that I would be out of town with no access to the internet, and left my digits in the mail, and asked her to text me when I cross her mind!

I went home and sat down and paid attention to all the steps that we needed to follow through in order to have Hommie’s Bank Account grow ten-fold!! Step 5 was wait at least 10 seconds before you do anything as the new system had a 5 second time-lag before any command could be initialized and then executed! The entire system was semi-patient because if it flopped, it would shut down for an hour and the entire IT department would hone in onto that one error, and would surely find out our ish within those 10 seconds…

Anyways, she called me later that night saying that I crossed her mind twice, earlier on but did not have any airtime on her phone… She had just stolen her Dad’s post-paid line and explained to me that after hustling with all his other children, her dad doesn’t fight with them anymore, but just regulates their calls by putting a 10 minute timer for non-regular calls, so she was going to find a way of having my digits being input as a regular called number!

So, we set aside the day and the time to grow Hommie’s bank Account to Friday afternoon at 15.34hours and be clear by 15.38 hours…. Leaving us exactly 240 seconds to pull off our biggest bank heist ever…..

Me and Ms. Ness chatted a lot more than we thought we could once our tense natures subsided.. She told me that she would not tell me where I lived, but show me only and only when I cross her mind again… I flinched a bit on the phone and she noticed ( oba how?) and I explained to her how I think she is a pretty thing and I think she must be fed up of a tonne of losers saying that… she sighed on the phone…

Me and Hommie then plotted for a few things;

nice new synchronized watches-CHECK;  

Money for taxi-CHECK;

Cool new shades-CHECK;

Clean clothes freshly ironed aka pressed-CHECK;

pack of cigarettes for the lousy security guards-CHECK;

Money for taxi to leave-CHECK;

You see, me and Hommie had planned to only set the plan in such a way that the dimez are multiplied onto our account, but not withdrawn… In such a way that we do print-outs of Hommie’s bank statements before and after and then go straight to the Managing Director MD/ Chief Executive Officer CEO / Head Ni99a In Charge HNIC/ BossOfDaBosses BODB/ SayMyNameTypeDudes SMNTD/ Don’tMessWithMePlayas you get the drift!

Anyways, Hommie and I walked to the entrance, went straight to that cute lady at enquiries and flashed her my biggest smile and asked her how much it would cost to have a print out of my Hommie’s latest bank statement! She gave us the charge and we didn’t flinch, but asked her to do so up to that specific time ( 15.20 hours Friday afternoon) We then went to the AT-Machines and input his card and did the gimmick as he had been taught. Meanwhile our insideman was catching on our drift and said he would beep Hommi’s phone on confirmation!

60 seconds later, InsideMan flashed the line and we finished our bizness… Left the ATMachine, and waited another 5 minutes before we went and input Hommie’s card again… This time he printed the statement!

It read 4,500,000/=UGX….

We walked straight to the MD/CEO/HNIC’s office and told his foine-ass secretary/ admin assistant/ his keeper/ coffee and biscuits maker/ you get the drift that we had an appointment!

In our best English accent ever, we sweet-talked her into letting us see him!

She gave in and we politely thanked him for seeing us and we told him that Hommie’s account had grown ten-fold in less than 20 minutes…

He asked for proof, and we showed it to him!

He did not believe us…

We attempted to walk out and he called us back and asked us to have a seat!

He then called our InsideMan who happened to be the most trusted insideman ever… He confirmed the mishap and he asked us to wait a while as he called his Head-Legal to come in to his office and write down the statements which we signed…

My heart was in my mouth as Hommie calmed me the heck down…

We signed the statement and MD promised that we would have that money removed off of Hommie’s account! And we would get a finder’s fee for pointing out the mishap and not sneaking the dimez as many others would have done!

Whence everybody left HNIC’s office, he asked us for the truth and we did not flinch at all… He sensed something was amiss, and he asked that we email him our resumes…

Later that evening, Ms. Ness called me saying her Dad asked her to pick up some stuff off of the printer and she saw what looked like a resume with my name on it…




8 responses

11 12 2009

You lie?

11 12 2009

Haha!! Dude. You are on a roll man.

Keep ’em comin’!

12 12 2009

Some katogo

12 12 2009

Small world? At least it’s to your advantage so far..

14 12 2009

wait for the third installment

On a roll indeed…

With lots of soup!

was thinking the exact same thoughts!

18 12 2009
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